This is the third in a series of blogs on this topic.
In my first blog of this series, I wrote about how parents told their children about the divorce (from the adult child's perspective) and how it felt to have divorced parents. In the second blog, I asked people what was the most difficult situation they faced as a result of their parents’ divorce. Today we look at the positive outcomes of divorce as felt by the adult children of divorce.
If couples are unhappy in a marriage, then perhaps the divorce can bring some positive to their lives and the lives of their children. The majority of people in my survey felt that some good had come out their parents' divorce. Four of the families got away from violent situations, five said there was less tension in their parents’ relationship with less fighting, and fourteen wrote about a parent finding new love, relationships, and/or marriage.
Jonathan said, “Maybe, by them getting a divorce,...
This is the second in a series of blogs on this topic.
In the first blog of this series, I wrote about how parents told their children about the divorce (from the adult child's perspective) and how it felt to have divorced parents.
As I mentioned, I am a teacher for the court-required parent education classes for divorcing or never-married parents. The goal of the class is not to teach people how to parent but how to co-parent with their ex-partner. I liken the relationship to one of a business relationship and stress the importance of respect in communication. Statistics show that 75% of children of divorce do fine, but the other 25% are directly affected by their parents’ level of conflict post-divorce. I remind people that if they disparage the child’s other parent, it’s as though they are taking a direct hit on their own child.
I asked people what was the most difficult situation they faced as a result of their parents’ divorc...
“It doesn't matter how old you are when parents divorce, in my opinion. It's always painful. It's a break, a rift, a severing of what was…” Lisa
This is the first in a series of blogs on this topic.
In Massachusetts, parents going through a divorce are required to take a parenting class. I’ve been teaching this class one to two times a month for the last year and I find that when I share with the participants that I’m a child of divorce, and have been for 45 years, they have a lot of questions for me. They want to know if their children are going to be okay, how long does it take to adjust, what can they do to make it work for their children, etc. These questions inspired me to ask questions of other adult children of divorce in the hope that parents getting divorced can learn from all of our experiences.
I had close to 50 respondents answer my questionnaire and they are different ages, from different backgrounds, live in all parts...